I loathe my very life; therefore I will give free rein to my complaint and speak out in the bitterness of my soul. (Job 10:1)

Job knew what it was like to wish he was dead. Sometimes Death seems preferable to facing the wreck that our marriage has become.

Many times when we are going through bitterness in our marriage, we lose our emotional connection between us and even less of a sexual connection. And we make peace with this situation. We just go along, doing our stuff. We think we have made peace with the situation, but we are compartmentalized. All along we feel a deep sadness about our marriage, but we keep that locked up. But it is a dangerous situation which sometimes pushes one spouse into an extra marital relationship in which they give their body to another person, and also their heart.

In such situations on Biblical grounds we can leave the marriage, but we realize our heart still wants to be married to our spouse who has drifted from us towards another person. We want God to fix our marriage.

Maybe some of us are bitterly disappointed in our marriage that we have fantasized about checking out. Your spouse has failed to live up to your expectations. And perhaps even more disappointing, you’ve failed to live up to your own expectations. You haven’t been the husband or wife you wanted to be. And that gulf between hope and reality is too much to bear.

Thankfully, you don’t have to bear that disappointment alone. Christ bears it with you. Initially we hesitate to follow Job’s example to “give free rein to our complaint and speak out in the bitterness of our soul” since voicing our hurt to God would require being honest with ourselves, and we don’t want to face that pain. Let our feelings come pouring out. God will listen. That talk will prompt lots of other conversations, sometimes very angry conversations.

By doing this we can learn a lot about ourselves and our spouse, about forgiveness and reconciliation. But most important we learn to be honest with God. We are always better off having laid it all out there before our God, who alone can turn our fiercest bitterness into love and joy.

LET’S TALK

1. Has there been a time when one of us has felt bitter disappointment in our marriage? What provoked that feeling? What did we do about it?
2. Are there any areas in our marriage about which we feel a sense of bitterness right now? How can we best address these feelings? How can God help us?
3. What are some ways God can turn bitterness to Joy?

Let’s not give up on any situation because, our God specializes in bringing life into dead situations in our marriage. Let’s partner with Him.

Hope you are being blessed with these devotions! We would love and be encouraged to listen to your comments on these devotions.