Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. (Ephesians 5:21)

Deferring to another means that my heart is yielded to the Holy Spirit’s work. It means that I am willing to give up my agenda, my preferences, and my schedules for the benefit of someone else. Deference means that my needs are not always my top priority. Deferring to my spouse means that I submit to God and then become aware of the caring about his/her needs.

It is important to note what deference is not. Deference is never a one-way street, God doesn’t appoint some to submit and some to, “lord it over” others. Deference is not relinquishing all my desires and becoming a “doormat”. God intends for us to give as well as receive.

We need to have the wisdom of paying deference to our spouse’s impressions about different issues in our marriage, and implement their suggestions and become more involved in the responsibilities ourselves, our home will become more calm and peaceful.

It’s impossible to maintain a submissive attitude in marriage apart from the Holy Spirit’s work. We can trust the Lord to bring the peace of oneness to two hearts as He forges a common bond of deference.

Q. In what specific areas do we need to defer to our spouse today?

PRAYER: Father, give me the grace to yield to You, and therefore to my spouse. Amen.

May this devotion help us to honestly introspect the areas we need to yield to our spouse for their benefit, and for the strengthening of our marriage.