AFFIRMING THEIR LOOKS

Affirming our children’s physical appearance from birth helps them to stop comparing themselves unfavourably with others, particularly during their teenage years.

In affirming their looks, we are helping them to distinguish between what they can change and what they cannot. So we might well encourage children to wash their hair, or provide a diet that will help them stay in shape, or ensure they are getting enough exercise, while recognising that different children have a different build, and we are not expecting them to look like a supermodel. Our aim is to help them to look their best while being confident in the natural shape of their own body. (Of course their definition of “best” may well be different to ours, particularly as teenagers).

In a culture obsessed with physical looks, focusing too much on their appearance will be unhelpful to them. Our aim is to assure them that we love them for who they are, with their own unique attributes. Of course a parent will want to help a child who is seriously overweight or has a bad attack of acne, but somehow at the same time, we have to let our children know that we love them anyway. That involves us being manifestly proud of them when they are at their gawkiest, and especially if their features don’t happen to fit in with what society at present considers “attractive.”

Conclusion
Words of affection, comfort, praise and affirmation make a deep and life-changing impact on our children. They need us to tell them how much we love them, not only when they please us but also when they least expect it.

Speaking like this requires unselfishness on our part. We have to put aside our own agenda, our tiredness, our frustration with the messy bedroom, or our disappointment at the terrible report, in order to take the time to think of something kind and positive to say. We will have to bite our tongue at times; but we will be astonished at the difference that a little encouragement can make to our child. Speaking this language of love will fill up the emotional tank inside.

Q. Think of three characteristics or attributes in each of your children that you would like to affirm this week.

And if you, as a parent, have anytime hurt your child’s feelings by coming down on them with your harsh remarks, I request you to take God’s grace to humble yourself and seek their forgiveness. This act goes a long way in building their self-esteem and self-confidence.

Let us, as parents, consciously take time to fill the emotional Love Tanks of our children, irrespective of what age they are, with Words of Affirmation/Encouragement.

PRAYER: Lord, as parents, help us role model you in affirming our children at all times and occasions, irrespective of what they do. Help us to concentrate on who they are more than concentrating what they do, while affirming them. In Jesus’ name, amen.

Hope these series of Parenting Devotions on affirming our children has been helpful to you in your parenting. GOD BLESS YOU IN YOUR PARENTING!